"Wiener Sausage: The Podcast!" Episode #5 Show Notes: July is the Best Month!

Perfect reading for July.

(These are show notes from my short-lived and perhaps ill-fated podcast with Dan Sullivan. May it always at least live on here. Sigh.)

1:55 - Thought for the day: July overtakes October as Paul's favorite month. Mostly for water-related reasons. And crab-related ones as well. Although Dan has been fighting organizations of various repute throughout the month, he too is fairly keen on the year's middle time. The only months that can cause distress for Dan are August and February, largely because "many people die" during those months.

7:45 - In case you forgot, Dan explains just exactly what this podcast is about. Well, our original musical, Wiener Sausage: the Musical! was a smorgasbord of music and comedy and life, so this is a continuation of that in podcast form.

10:00 - In the name of the DC Capital Fringe theater festival, which is currently underway, and where our musical was staged to sellout crowds in 2008, we start a reading of the script, which will be an ongoing story you will want to follow each week. Kinda like a South American telenovela. It begins with Guy Williams, who is based on a character that Dan created as part of the bedtime stories he would tell his little brother when they were kids and which they termed "Master Pervert Theater."

12:30 - Act One, Prelude of Wiener Sausage: The Musical! An all-knowing, Star Wars-like voice sets the scene. And Guy Williams takes the stage only to ramble a bit before he realizes there's an audience in front of him. Then he sings the opening absurd pop nugget titled "It Starts With a Love Between a Boy and a Girl."

17:30 - Dan and Paul discuss how a business storyline courses through the musical and that it fits pretty well in the current climate, in relation to how we have a CEO In Chief in the White House. Does our audience have any good ideas to add to Wiener Sausage: The Rock Opera? Dan suggests any rewrites should incorporate more music, ala the wildly successful Hamilton.

22:20 - A word from our latest sponsor, Coco Loko! Wildly exciting! Mildly offensive!! Debatably addictive!!!

23:00 - The duo pontificates again on British culture; fittingly, in this the month of our British independence.

26:30 - The magic moment arrives! Dan snorts a thick line of Coco Loko.Dan reveals that he is reclining in his comfortable bed as he does the podcast and snorts a line. Paul says he would never advise such posture during either activity. But Dan interrupts him to report that the energy buzz is kicking in, live, in the middle of the podcast. Quality entertainment!

37:30 - Pop Culture Wiener Sausage News Central Headline of the Week! From the country of Georgia, Nazis attack a vegan cafe by throwing meat around. The story makes very little sense. However, Dan's explanation of some of Hitler's behavior helps explain things, and ...

45:00 - So does the EXCLUSIVE interview that Paul conducts from an undisclosed location, forced to wear a blindfold. He talks with Morty Von Hammenheim, a member of the group, who initially makes Paul quite nervous. But as the interview goes along, Von Hammenheim surprisingly turns out to be a rather sympathetic character claiming his group is simply misunderstood. He just wants cigarette smoking to flower again in full and for there to be "meat in every corner" and "around your neck."

56:45 - Paul and Dan recall the story of the Washington DC Smoking Man, who used to try to get everyone to boycott DC bars and go to nearby Arlington because, at that point, Arlington still allowed people to smoke in bars.

58:00 - Finally, a Pop Culture Wiener Sausage News Update on Carl Edward Cunningham, whom we interviewed in the last podcast and has since pleaded guilty to stealing his buddy's Star Wars action figures, facing four years in prison when sentenced this fall. Dan calls for him to be imprisoned for much longer.

1:00:15 - A phrase to take us out on ... Paul offers, "Go get your Boba Fett figures at the Super Safe Mega Valu Mart."

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Perfect eating for July.

Wiener Sausage: The Podcast! Episode #2 dives deeper into the Wiener Sausage mysteries

(These are show notes from my short-lived and perhaps ill-fated podcast with Dan Sullivan. May it always at least live on here. Sigh.)

Yes, we made it back for a second episode.

​These things can never be taken for granted. But again, we think we're finding our groove ... with the help of another excellent guest, Sean Felix, who was a star of the 2008 D.C. production of our Wiener Sausage: the Musical!

3:00 - Dan and Paul discuss who the audience for this podcast might be. The decision: it will help listeners escape reality, much like how dingy taverns helped us do so back when we were in our 20s. Also touched upon: does drinking alcohol help or hurt creativity? The science seems to still be out. But one thing is sure, it's a lot harder to howl at the moon without alcohol!

​7:00 - A word from our sponsor, June Weenie's Self Defense Academy, leads us into a special reading of a never-before-heard extra scene from Wiener Sausage: The Musical!, read by Dan, Paul, and guest Sean. Continuing the tradition, as reviewed by the Washington Post, as "tasteless yet popular." Your job as the listener? Relax, and learn.

12:30 - A word from another one of our sponsors: Prana Bridger jeans. The perfect pants for Kevin Costner.

16:00 - Introducing Sean Felix, who played a character whose name neither one of the playwrights seem to remember. We think; however, that it was Professor Dr. Ewing/Uwe Schmock. Sean reveals that he was drifting around in life until the role came about and he found more purpose.

21:30 - Sean describes what Wiener Sausage: The Musical! is all about, in under a minute. And what does the musical have to do with what we're now trying to do with this podcast/radio show? The musical was insane and so were the times, politically and socially. Nothing much has changed, so this podcast may just be very right for the times.

26:45 - Sean is now a teacher with a family in Hyattsville, Maryland. He reads lots of comic books, and among his favorites is Black Hammer, plus a book called Countdown that is great for teaching kids about the Cold War.

​31:45 - The words for the week. "Sometimes it's OK to pull the covers over your head."

The 3-minute interview: Paul Mackie

In the category of ruthless self-promotion: This was my favorite interview ever with, ah hem, yours truly. (And Wiener Sausage: The Musical!'s co-writer Dan Sullivan.) By one of my favorite journalists, Leah Fabel of the Washington Examiner.

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WASHINGTON, July 10, 2008 - Five years ago, music man Paul Mackie and playwright Dan Sullivan had a wild barroom dream of producing a musical. Today, it has morphed into some sort of reality called “Wiener Sausage: The Musical!,” a soon-to-be cult classic to premiere Saturday night as part of D.C.’s Capital Fringe Festival. For a complete list of showtimes, go to wienersausagethemusical.com or capitalfringe.org.

“Wiener Sausage” is an intriguing title, but what’s it about?

Very hard to explain. It’s about everything and nothing. There’s an overwhelming philosophical message conveyed through a comedy about sex scandals, politics, war, death, secret societies, megastores, the media, the environment and the Apocalypse.

How did it come to be?

We were debating the pronunciation of the word smock, the thing you wear. So we Googled it and found a link to Dr. Uwe Schmock’s paper on Brownian motion in wiener sausage pathways — it was a serious math theory. That was the moment of revelation when we named the master mad scientist Professor Schmock and he created the Wiener Sausage Derivative, which could account for the entire map of the history of time.

Do you have a favorite lyric from the show?

“Washington Monument, Eiffel Tower. Conductors of super love power.”

Are you doing this for love or money?

We’re doing this for the love of art and of sausage, but we’ll take your money for the sake of art.

What do you hope people get out of the experience?

We want their stomachs to hurt from laughing so hard, and from eating all of the hot dogs that Chief Ike’s will be selling. [“Wiener Sausage” will be performed at Chief Ike’s Mambo Room at 1725 Columbia Road NW.] We’ll also be selling souvenir pint mugs to drink from during the show.

One: that the mainstream media stops [doing a bad job]. Two: that politics stops being corrupt. Three: that true love always wins in the end.

Wiener Sausage: The Podcast! Episode #3 Part 2 Show Notes: Talking Physics, Sausages, and Geopolitical Destruction with Peter Sullivan!

(These are show notes from my short-lived and perhaps ill-fated podcast with Dan Sullivan. May it always at least live on here. Sigh.)

Is that sausage The Fat Boy is making?

0:00 - A word from our sponsor, Wendy's. "Where's the Beef?"
0:45 - We introduce our interview guest for the show, Peter Sullivan, Dan Sullivan's dad and a financial backer/spiritual guru for Wiener Sausage: The Musical! Everyone agrees that we're exhausted because none of us went to bed early the night before and neither the hosts nor the guest are morning people.
3:00 - We learn that, in the Wiener era, Peter was watching his children become "responsible citizens."
5:30 - As we've entered into Trump's unreal world of reality, we discuss how war and sex has transformed in the decade since the musical was produced in Washington D.C. It's interesting to see the Russian cold war kicking back into full gear.
8:15 - Peter reflects on how many of the wars throughout history have been over resources, and that "renewables" was a forward-thinking theme within Wiener Sausage's plotline since wind and solar power have begun to play a major role as energy sources. Dan establishes that co-host Paul Mackie is "an environmentalist."
12:30 - In the last episode, we talked all about Star Wars. This is a nice segue to a conversation with Peter about the "Star Wars" missile-defense system he worked on under the Reagan administration. He worked on policy issues and was in no way a mad scientist like our lead evil character in Wiener Sausage, Professor Dr. Schmock.
​17:30 - The good new: "The Fat Boy" in North Korea's missiles are still "lower-threat" missile systems and we and the Israelis can be pretty successful at this point in stemming any attacks.
19:30 - The other good news: We probably have never truly developed a doomsday device to destroy the world!
20:40 - Fun fact! Russia can't get Alcoholic Anonymous to work.
24:00 - Dan eloquently waxes on how the writing of our musical was the result of the new dangers felt throughout the country in the wake of the 9/11 years. We dealt with this national struggle with comedy.
27:00 - Peter, in true guru form, says, "The best things in life are a good laugh and a good physic." Look that one up! Aaaaaaaaand this episode returns from its deep political discussion to its scatological roots.
30:00 - Or perhaps politics and sausage are exactly what this show is about. We're still figuring it out, but Peter does an excellent job at helping summarize and lead us into whatever that future may be.
34:00 - Paul and Dan struggle to figure out a great way to "take us out."

Announcing the debut of Wiener Sausage: The Podcast!

(These are show notes from my short-lived and perhaps ill-fated podcast with Dan Sullivan. May it always at least live on here. Sigh.)

Episode #1 Show Notes - "A Trip Down Wiener Lane" 5/19/2017 0 Comments To continue on from my co-host's admirable ramblings in his first blog post at our new site, I've promised to publish the "show notes" - or podcast outline - for each of our shows. What you will find in this show, as we experiment with various recording technologies and ramp up to get these all posted more officially in the iTunes App store, is as follows: Opening: Dan uncovered some old Sprogs music to dress the show (Thanks, even if they didn't know they were going to be revived, to my old bandmates Paula Luxenberg, Gordie Shaw, and Tim Getman). We hope you like the show and the completely unauthorized use of your music. 1:00: Dan notes that "perfect is the enemy of the good." He surmises that waiting until we can make the perfect podcast would mean we would never do it, so we're just going for it, scars and all. Please bear with us as we grow to hopefully get good and entertaining some day. 3:00: We describe how we, as interlopers into the Washington D.C. theater community, produced Wiener Sausage: The Musical! nearly a decade ago. With much help from a fellow named Kenny. 8:00: The news of the day discussed is the increasingly polarized language of Twitterers on both sides of the love Trump and hate Trump divide. Are we becoming a psychotic nation? Discuss. 11:30: Our first-ever guest is Kathleen Sullivan Nelson, star of Wiener Sausage: The Musical! The interview somehow includes a fascinating advertisement for an Audio Technica microphone. But more importantly, Kathleen talks about (in a sort of Where Are They Now?-type segment) the corporate circus-like events she is now helping produce. Not much different, we surmise, from her gig as Jo, the musical comedy's hermaphrodite protagonist. The three also discuss how Wiener Sausage influenced Hamilton. 18:30 Kathleen plows through a version of one of her Wiener spotlight songs, "Not Cash or Check, Baby," despite Dan and Paul talking throughout her impromtu performance. 24:00: In summary, are Dan and Paul crazy, and only interested in talking about themselves and their fancy new microphone? Well, to our credit, they did end up letting Kathleen have the last word. And boy are those words inspiring. Don't miss them! And see you next time.

Wiener Sausage: The Podcast! Episode #3 Part 1 Show Notes: Parents - Don't Allow Your Children to Collect Star Wars Action Figures

(These are show notes from my short-lived and perhaps ill-fated podcast with Dan Sullivan. May it always at least live on here. Sigh.)

The latest episode of Wiener Sausage: The Podcast! is now upon us. This is how it unfolds:
1:00 - A hot heatwave overtakes the early-Sunday-morning minds of our co-hosts Dan Sullivan and Paul Mackie.
2:00 - Nevertheless, the high standards of podcast recording are not compromised. And somehow our hosts connect the Wiener Sausage Theorem with the algorithms of Garageband.
3:30 - The topic of discussion for this episode is Stars Wars stuff. Also, can Star Wars and Wiener Sausage fans be aligned? Considering the fact that Dan and Paul once walked out midway through a Star Wars movie, perhaps not. But granted, they did walk out at the line, "Hold me like you held me on the plains of Naboo."

The plains of Naboo

6:35 - Stars Wars is in the news these days, even though there is no brand new movie being released. Sillof is an artist who is modifying Star Wars action figures to be sort of half Star Wars/half whatever the characters were influenced by. Weird, but cool and interesting. Perhaps Dan can collect them since his parents wouldn't allow him to collect the original figures (WTF?).
10:00 - Also in Star Wars news, Rancho Obi-Wan in Northern California is seeing thefts of its memorabilia, and it turns out it's the owner's friend who is stealing the goods, such as a Boba Fett action figure. Dan becomes very concerned about catching the thief, Carl Edward Cunningham.
12:30 - A message from a corporation that may or may not be one of the show's sponsors: Kiva Maqui Berry Powder. Dan and Paul are unsure what the product is, but it may be snortable and/or a supplement.
17:00 - A break at the end of part 1 of this episode prepares listeners for an interview in part 2 with Peter Sullivan, a key backer of Wiener Sausage: The Musical! back in 2008.

Wiener Sausage Rises to iTunes! Episode #4 Show Notes: Independence Day Special Edition:

(These are show notes from my short-lived and perhaps ill-fated podcast with Dan Sullivan. May it always at least live on here. Sigh.)

We start with confusion by numbers. Although this is the fourth (or fifth, depending on who you ask) episode of Wiener Sausage: The Podcast!, it is the first we're posting to the big time: iTunes. You will now be able to subscribe to the show and listen to it with ease as you mow your lawn, drive to work, or enjoy your prescription meth.

We'll straighten all the numbers out eventually. Meanwhile, here are the show notes. Happy 4th of July!

0:00 - Dan and Paul open in stereotypically morbid fashion, with tales of near-death experiences involving funerals, ocean swimming, and automobiles.

7:00 - Life tip: You should never brake on the highway because it will cause massive delays for hundreds of cars behind you.

8:00 - Dan now owns a Fiat. He doesn't know much about it other than it looks like a little yellow bee. Car Talk this show isn't.

13:00 - A word from our latest sponsor. It couldn't be more fitting, especially in relation to the $500 million worth of hamburger meat that will be sold to Americans over the 4th of July holiday: Meatland!

16:30 - After a very long lead and intro into the word for our sponsor, here actually is where the ad begins.

18:30 - That ad just got Dan and Paul both hungry for some Vienna sausages.

19:00 - Wiener Sausage Pop Culture News presents a discussion on the beauty of obituary writing, the death of Stephen Furst of Animal House fame, and friends who have recently died.

26:00 - Dan and Paul relive some fun stories from college debauchery and academic intrigue at Southern Illinois University at Carbondale and Washington University.

32:00 - Every time Dan asks whether a celebrity is dead already, they aren't but then they die days later. Let's hope this doesn't hold true after our discussion of the legendary Harrison Ford.

33:15 - "Free," one of the songs from Wiener Sausage: The Musical!, as played by Paul's former band The Sprogs.

38:00 - Paul secures an exclusive, exciting interview with Carl Everett Cunningham, who has allegedly stolen as much as $200,000 in Star Wars action figures from the Obi-Wan Ranch in California.

44:00 - Uh, the interview finally actually begins. If you hadn't noticed, Paul and Dan like long contextual setups.

53:00 - Because meats are about to be served for the holiday, our hosts run out of time. Dan gives Paul another shot at "signing out" after a miserably failed attempt during the last show. He does a tiny bit better this time.

Remington the Christmas Mouse Offers Promising Holiday Tale from D.C. Author

Nothing surprises me anymore with D.C.'s renaissance man Dan Sullivan. That may be because I spent 5 years writing Wiener Sausage: The Musical! with him.

But that doesn't mean you shouldn't be pleasantly surprised. His latest work takes a detour from his stop-and-start blog, his non-profit leadership, his masterful on-stage storytelling, and this past weekend's zany turn at Chief Ike's Mambo Room in Adams Morgan as the world's leading "vajazzler" (don't ask).

It's a children's holiday book called Remington the Christmas Mouse. This story, much like Wiener Sausage (some might say), is a little raw but has a lot of promise.

The premise is creative: The star has fallen off the top of the Green Family's Christmas tree and without it being set properly in place to rise up the chimney and into the sky to light the way to the Green's house for Santa, the family will have to make due without a Christmas.

Enter Remington, an ornament who lives near the bottom of the tree. He realizes the star needs to make it back to the top of the tree but he also knows that the tree's hierarchical cliques of ornaments (the best and prettiest ones get to have all the fun at the top) will make this a treacherous and near impossible journey. He recruits a couple of other bottom-of-the-tree outcasts, a bear and a clock, who help him navigate upwards.

The story is great and captivating. My recommendation, however, is that Remington would work better as a shorter children's book with lots more illustration from Kate Sullivan Nelson. Also, in the Amazon Kindle version I read, there were a dozen or so errors (where words were misspelled or misplaced), so that should be cleaned up. Finally, I'm not sure all the talk of Remington and his pals clearly being inferior because they are not as good-looking as the top-of-the-tree dwellers works for a children's book, where inclusivity and diversity are qualities worth reinforcing for young children. I would say there could be a better (and perhaps even funnier) way to highlight the social differences of the various ornaments.

A lot of promise from Mr. Sullivan is displayed in this book, and "children's storyteller" is clearly yet another side of of this artist that is well worth exploring further.

**** out of ***** stars

Wiener Sausage: The Musical! Getting Cold?

Yes, the buns have chilled a little since the heat generated by last summer's world premiere of Wiener Sausage: The Musical! The musical comedy, co-written by myself and ingenue Dan Sullivan, is expected to make a tour of various cities throughout the U.S. But Dan and I have to stop being lazy, hire an agent, and get the ball rolling again.

Professor Doctor Ewing Schmock will rise again!

First Guest Blogger: Sean Felix Rocks Your World

As MonotremeInDC grows (we've now got readers from Brazil to the UK to Tanzania!), I’ve decided to seek contributions. My friend Sean Felix (pictured, right), who played Professor Dr. Schmock last summer in my musical comedy Wiener Sausage: The Musical!, has agreed to submit a few posts each month on what I believe to be his excellent and trend-setting musical tastes. Take it away, Sean:

The main reason I’m doing this is because I don’t have anyone to talk about music with these days, even though I can’t stop buying new music and even rediscovering old music.

On that last note, for the past couple of months, I’ve been saying that I was going to re-pot my plants so that they don't die slowly. Well, I actually got around to it on Wednesday while listening to CSNY's album Déjà Vu. It’s got a bunch of great songs, including "Carry On," "Almost Cut My Hair," and "Woodstock," to name a few. I got so distracted listening to it I got lost in listening to it.

I almost regret not having listened to the album during the House/pseudo-hippie phase I went through, but I don’t think I would have appreciated it nearly as much. Being high and listening to it back in the day would have been fine, but I wouldn't have gotten most of the songs on the album. Not because I wouldn't have understood what they were saying, but I was pretty dumb back then, both intellectually and emotionally. And this album and many of the albums from that era require you to have either lived during the late '60s or to at least understand what the era meant to the hippies, the squares, the soldiers, and the everyday families like those of our parents.

Having gained a musical literacy through the years makes the album come to life. The fantastic harmonization on most of the songs rivals the harmonization Brian Wilson dragged out of the Beach Boys. And the acoustic arrangements on all of the songs make you appreciate what an acoustic guitar can do in folk music, almost making you forgive the douche bag on your college campus with no shirt on, playing guitar on the quad.

But more than anything, growing older and listening to this album means I can sit on my balcony when I’m done potting my plants with a glass of Wild Turkey, and get loaded nice and slowly while enjoying a music style that I totally wrote off when I was younger.

Wiener Sausage: The Songs!

Plans are still in the works to carry Wiener Sausage: The Musical! forward to other cities in the U.S. Those plans are predictably coming along slowly by WS's co-creators, myself and Dan Sullivan (pictured left), but they're still coming.

In the meantime, I'll be editing some footage of the Capital Fringe performances from last summer and posting on You Tube.

For starters, here are clips of the songs Not Cash or Check, Baby and Free.

For more songs, stories, and similar nonsense, go to the Wiener Sausage Web site.

Mean Girls teaches important bullying lessons but feels a little unnecessary

Mean Girls, which I saw last weekend in the theater with my 10-year-old daughter, is a good thing to do on a rainy afternoon with your 10-year-old daughter. It's a breezy adaptation of the 2018 musical that was an adaptation of the 2004 Lindsay Lohan-led movie that was an adaptation of the 2002 book Queen Bees and Wannabes.

I liked it, which is saying something because I generally don't like musicals - even though I co-wrote Wiener Sausage: The Musical! - but it also seems like a money grab with no real purpose for existing. The only real differences from the earlier classic movie include songs bursting out of the same dialogue as before (and none are particularly memorable other than the "I Am Regina George" number) and some things cleaned up to be less offensive to a slightly more evolved audience. One of the best things about it is, in fact, the way it opens the dialogue a bit more on how bullying and being mean are not helpful to anyone, and it seems young girls like my daughter can truly benefit from that conversation being more out in the open. (I ask her sometimes if there are any bullies in 5th grade, and she has so far always said no, which is impressive, since I remember after-school fights being a routine happening when I was an elementary-school kid.)

Probably the main draw to see Mean Girls for me was Reneé Rapp, who is exceptional in The Sex Lives of College Girls, and is a pretty perfect meanest of the mean girls. I think she's an upgrade from 2004's Rachel McAdams. The other characters that were a pleasure in the new version were Auliʻi Cravalho and Jaquel Spivey as the weird kids who attempt to help Cady Heron (played admirably, if not as well, as Lohan by Angourie Rice) fit into her new school and also Jon Hamm, brilliantly playing a P.E. teacher on the sex-ed beat.

While the strictly-entertainment side of me says this is a rollicking good time, the critic side of me laments the new Mean Girls' lack of originality or adding much of anything to earlier versions, the plotless and not-catchy songs, the lesser illumination of the characters' personalities and motivations, and all the boring plot points about social media.

3 out of 5 stars

My Wiener Sausage Co-Writer "Comes Out"

My Wiener Sausage: The Musical! co-creator Dan Sullivan made his Woolly Mammoth stage premiere last week in SpeakeasyDC's excellent production of Don't Ask, Do Tell (Stories About Coming Out, Coming Clean, and Just Plain Coming).

It was basically a stand-up, improv show, with 12 individuals telling their own stories of the process of becoming openly gay, lesbian, or trans-gendered.

Dan (in the center on the photo to the right) of course stole the show, with his dry wit and all-around loveable-ness and impossible-to-not-like-ness. He was 19 and working his job as a flagpole-raiser at the U.S. Capitol (a job that entails a complete fabrication by the U.S. government upon clueless patriotic flag-buyers everywhere). His straight, pink-haired buddy Charlie protected Dan's Private Idaho every step of the way from their redneck co-worker Larry, who fumed all summer that someone had left an issue of the Washington Blade in the Capitol break room.

Other standout storytellers in the show included Andrew Korfhage (telling perhaps the dirtiest tale of the night about his education on sex words in sign language and how he was busted using such language by his boss at the non-profit Co-op America), Regie Cabico (a manic poetry slammer who is big in Canada and had some wild times in his college dorm room) and MC and co-director John Kevin Boggs. All the other performers were either funny or at least had compelling stories to share, which was a pretty impressive feat for the production.

**** out of ***** stars

Bye Bye Birdie flies like a butterfly through D.C.'s Kennedy Center

I have a bit of a rule that I really don't enjoy musicals. I know, I co-wrote Wiener Sausage: The Musical! Of course there are great ones out there like Hedwig and the Angry Inch. There are movies like La La Land, Grease, Yesterday, Willy Wonka, A Star is Born, The Doors, Sing Street, and the list goes on.

So, ok, I guess I tolerate and every once in a while love musicals, which made going to the Kennedy Center Thursday night to see Bye Bye Birdie a little bit of a risky situation. But, it turns out, you would have to be a seriously hardened individual to not get carried away in the relentless joy of this story of the age-old struggles between Ed Sullivan-loving parents and their risque-pop-star-loving teens.

Despite the fact that I really want to start going to theater performances again (after a lack of doing so over the past five years, especially after letting my Woolly Mammoth season pass expire), I probably would not have gone to Bye Bye without the added incentive of seeing my wife's cousin Caroline Aaron in action. She's a renowned actor well-known to audiences from her roles in Woody Allen movies, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, Edward Scissorhands, Curb Your Enthusiasm, and many more. This was the first time I've seen her on stage, and she doesn't disappoint as the curmudgeonly, racist mother of a record executive named Albert who has dreams of leaving the business, settling down with his girl Rosie, and becoming an English teacher.

With Albert's main client, Conrad Birdie, getting drafted into the military, this seems like the time for Rosie to convince Albert to make a clean break from his occupation. She comes up with a plan for Albert to immediately write a song for Conrad to sing on the Ed Sullivan Show before he leaves and to give "one last kiss" to a lucky member of Birdie's fan club. That's where the other side of the story comes in: Kim from Sweet Apple, Ohio is a member of the fan club and wins the kiss, but this causes strife with her steady boyfriend Hugo and her dad, played hilariously by Richard Kind, of Red Oaks, Scrubs, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Mad About You, and many others.

Bye Bye Birdie has a rich history. here are some interesting nuggets about the show:

• The script was inspired by Elvis Presley getting drafted into the Army.
• Conrad Birdie was a play on country singer Conway Twitty's name.
• The original Broadway production starting in 1960 starred Dick Van Dyke, Chita Rivera, and Paul Lynde.
• In this new production, Ephraim Sykes plays Birdie, and he is well known for his roles in Hamilton, Vinyl, and 30 Rock.
• "Put On a Happy Face" is by far the song I recognized the most before seeing the show.

All of the songs are catchy in the production, the orchestra is magnificant, and the dancers are incredibly talented. My minor complaints are that I think some of the numbers are a little too long and, with such a thin story line, the fare is air light (not necessarily a bad thing in these often dark times).

4 out of 5 stars

Punched in the Face By Brutal Realism

It's great to see my friend Tim Getman getting better and better parts. He is firmly entrenched as a leading light in the formidable DC theater scene.

The production of Cherry Smoke at Silver Spring's Roundhouse Theater, of which he both stars and co-produces with Jessica Burgess (who helped produce my own Wiener Sausage: The Musical!), is a powerful exploration of the small-town psyche that accompanies extreme poverty and hopelessness.

Getman plays Fish, a miscreant boxer who can't get anything right other than beating other people senseless. Tangled amidst the sparse setting of ropes hanging from the ceiling, he does a pretty good job of abusing the minds of those closest to him as well.

Cherry is played with Huck Finn-like goodness by Julia Procter. A country tomboy, she loves Fish with all her heart, waits for months at a time for him to return from his frequent stints in lockup, and seems to turn to smoke without the hot breath and embrace of her soulmate.

Fish's little brother, Duffy (Cliff Williams III), and Duffy's wife Bug (Jjana Valentiner, a veteran of one staged reading of Wiener Sausage), help move Fish's story along. As Duffy narrates, he and his wife's ultimate normalness is an excellent contrast to Fish and Cherry's more passionate, but ultimately less sustainable, relationship.

The performances are top-notch and Burgess has done a lot with a fairly minimalist script. The story is eventually tragic, and by the end, the audience cares greatly about and sympathizes with four characters whom urban theatergoers likely have little in the way of commonalities.

**** out of ***** stars

Sacha Baron Cohen is a One-Man Riot in The Dictator

Sacha Baron Cohen has a winning formula in place. He doesn't give us too much, introducing only one new character to us every few years. But when he does release a character, what a doozy it is always proves to be.

The Dictator introduces Crazy Character #4 to the world. I love Ali G, Borat, and Bruno. And I can't wait to see Baron Cohen in 2014 as Freddie Mercury in Mercury. This current role adds another layer to the most politically incorrect actor of our time.

The film is dedicated to Kim Jong Il. Every single race is skewered and roasted. Women and food co-op types are ruthlessly ridiculed. The Dictator pours urine on an Israeli diplomat.

But yet a lot of what makes Sasha Cohen brilliant is that he injects bits that are so poignant and profound, so true, and so shockingly deep and moving into the mix of the underarm and goat-sex jokes. His final speech in New York, where much of the action takes place, is one of the most biting indictments of American democracy that I have ever seen.

If you can get past the crudity and amazing tastelessness of it all (kind of reminds me of Wiener Sausage: The Musical! quite a bit. Several of Baron Cohen's lines and jokes are eerily similar to some in the musical comedy I wrote with Dan Sullivan), you will be richly rewarded with an amazing time at the movies.

****1/2 out of *****

Wiener Sausage's Website Gets the Fat Trimmed

Thanks to my co-playwright, Dan Sullivan, the Wiener Sausage: The Musical! website has been revised. Although there was more there before, this nicely trims some of the excess fat.

We hope to add more original comedy bits through the introduction of a blog on the site, as well as more video, photos, and music, so check back often.

As the site says, The Wiener will, um, rise again!!!

Paul Mackie and Gordie Shaw: Bedroom Politics

Half of The Sprogs reunited last night at Eastern Village Cohousing's first Common Grounds coffee house cafe/club night. Gordie Shaw accompanied me on 10 songs (one of which I actually accompanied him on). I'll post several of the songs we played.

The above clip is "Bedroom Politics," the only song we played from the musical comedy I wrote with Dan Sullivan, Wiener Sausage: The Musical!

Gordie and I played after another former Sprogger, Tim Getman, played with Gordie and Phil in their bluegrass band.

Gordie and I played this set list, featuring two songs from my Edwardsville, Illinois-based group Monotremes (1997-1999):

Chocolate Kisses (Monotremes)

Drownin' (The Sprogs)

Seekers of the Truth and the Impossible (The Sprogs)

It Never Rains in Southern California (Albert Hammond)

The Tide is High (Blondie)

Future Rock Star (Paul Mackie)

We Refrain (The Sprogs)

A Horse With No Name (America)

Winter of My Youth (Monotremes)

Bedroom Politics (The Sprogs)

 

Woolly Mammoth Cooks Books With Fever/Dream

Fever/Dream might be the least-enjoyable play I've seen at DC's Woolly Mammoth Theater. It takes a 17th Century play by Pedro Calderón de la Barca about princes and monarchies and transforms it into a nonsensical corporate office environment.

Not only is the corporate version cliche (if you're going to take it on, you've got your work cut out to be better than The Office or Office Space), but the ridiculous premise isn't funny. A long-haired hermit has been locked in the basement of his father's corporation answering customer-service calls his whole life. Finally, the boss wants to retire and hand the company to his freakish captive.

It doesn't work. And neither does the play. There are possibilities for huge laughs, but they rarely come. It almost seems like playwright Sheila Callaghan is trying to make some important statement on society about how people aren't dealt the same decks of cards and rich and powerful people live in a fishbowl. In the end, it's pretty clear what has happened and there's unfortunately not much need to discuss any of it with your fellow theatergoers.

All that said, the set is cool. The show has a large cast, which is unusual for the Woolly, and one of the blogger characters is played excellently by Lauren Ciandella, who was newshound Jane in my Fringe production last year of Wiener Sausage: The Musical! Kate Eastwood Norris and Kimberly Gilbert are hilarious and goofy and mesmerizing as always, even more impressive considering the lacking material.

** out of ***** stars

Yes, We Could Get More Stupid, and Idiocracy Shows Us How

It's believed that Mike Judge's 2006 sci-fi comedy Idiocracy was released in far fewer theaters because of the way companies like Starbucks and Carl's Jr. were portrayed in it.

Fox, the distributor, allegedly didn't like that its advertisers were being treated unkindly. This is probably just one of many reasons to, even now, eight years later, watch the movie, which runs from time to time on cable TV.

I caught it on Comedy Central last night and thought it was hilarious. Luke Wilson and Maya Rudolph play an average soldier and a prostitute respectively who get shipped 500 years into the future in a military experiment gone awry.

Once there, they encounter an America that has seen its gene pool deteriorate to the point where nobody is literate and people sit on their toilet loungers watching TV shows that make today's reality television look like Lawrence of Arabia.

Someone could easily say Idiocracy is, like what the Washington Post called the musical comedy I wrote with Dan Sullivan called Wiener Sausage: The Musical!, "tasteless and popular." But you can't even really say that. Sure, it's tasteless, but not many people saw it. Over the years, it has built a cult following and is becoming relatively more popular.

But if you're a fan of other Judge offerings, like Beavis and Butt-Head, Office Space, and Extract, go quickly to your DVR to schedule Idiocracy.

**** out of ***** stars